Sabotage comes in many forms.

Set yourself, and your home up for success in health, fitness, and performance.

Big goals don’t come without challenges that aren’t always obvious. Whether you are going on a weight loss journey or training for your first marathon, I have seen a few challenges continuously pop up for well meaning athletes and clients. There is a decent chance you have had one of this come up so I wanted to write about them here and there with examples and how to manage them if they are happening to you or around you as you get to chasing your big goals. The support system is always important and communication can make or break your efforts. The story below is true and some ways you won’t experience something similar are laid out below!

Names are changed for obvious reasons.

The “on a different page or stage” spouse.

Ron came to me when he was 100 pounds overweight. He was a quiet professional that worked hard to provide for the family. Had a loving wife and kids. For 12 months he met me for an hour three days a week at 5am. He would meet me at the gym and GET. AFTER. IT. It was hard for him. Really hard. He was trying to change habits from the past 30 years. His movement habits. His nutrition. Everything. And it worked. After a year he was down 70 pounds. He was moving better. His confidence soared. The first 10 minutes of each session that used to be filled with nervous energy and silence turned into him showing up 10 minutes early to warm up and be ready for the day. He was doing what so few ever do and I was extremely proud of him.

Then, almost over a one week timespan, he had to quit working with me. This is as extreme example as I can remember in my career but basically, his wife was NOT happy with the changes he was making. No kidding, she was putting his old habits and temptations all over the house. She would keep candy and Little Debbie cakes on the counter and around the house. He was frustrated and didn’t know what to do. When I dug a little I found out that she thought he was going through a crisis of sorts to be a version of himself that she wouldn’t be worthy to stay with him. It doesn’t seem real but when you don’t set expectations for your home and those in it, some of these goals have no chance.

So often the desire to change your health, fitness, and performance habits come from within. You have been researching and plodding how to get there. When you finally do take action and haven’t let those closest know what it will take to get there, the friction begins. Resentment, jealousy, and isolation are some of the ways your own well meaning efforts take hold of those in your home.

After this experience I have always asked clients or potential clients if they have a support system set up and if they have a family at home on board. It’s a small amount of communication that can make or break your efforts.

Whether you are hiring a coach or not there are a few ways to communicate with your support system before you dive in.

Tell them the time commitment you expect: Giving family an idea of how their “access” to you might change is important. If you are usually the one making a big breakfast on Saturday mornings but that time is filled with you doing a run or workout, let them know.

Ask if they have any big goals to work on at the same time: Bringing others along for the ride creates more of a team atmosphere. Your significant other may have no interest in running a 50k but they may want to run the 5k on the same day. You just have to ask!

Explain your why: So many health, fitness, and performance goals seem selfish from the outside. Explaining that you want to be a better, stronger, version of yourself so you can give more to your family or friends really helps. Taking care of yourself should never really bring friction but we are dealing with humans and real emotions. Never forget that!

I really hope this helps you navigate your efforts to being a better version of yourself! If you have any examples of these dynamics I would love to hear them.

Thanks for reading!